This is exactly how this blog has been!
This blog has become a series of stop's and go's that have no definite ending. My last entry was in February 2013, when I actually seriously thought that because I have decided to go on extended maternity leave to take care of my firstborn, Evey, that I'd get plenty of chances and topics to blog about. Boy, was I wrong! The last year has been the toughest year of our lives in terms of physical burnout, sleeplessness, emotional exhaustion and everything that comes with taking care of a baby. The happiness, of course, was also immeasurable, but let's talk about that some other time.
Fast forward to June 2014, here I am again. Writing an entry where I will vow to be more consistent with my blogging. Truth is, I am not so tired tonight and I am feeling a bit anxious, so I just decided to put my thoughts down on this blog.
This type of night has been popping up quite a few times now over the past few months. I always get this desire to write and express myself through this platform; and once I revisit my blog, I feel a sense of longing to continue what I started so many years ago. I remember that I actually enjoy this.
Then I find myself actually again so tired in the evening, or distracted by so many other little things I need to do that blogging felt trivial or much like a chore. I also feel that there is nothing to talk about even if there are a million things running on my mind. But guess the hesitancy mainly comes from doubting myself if what I have to say here actually means anything to anyone. So, I just end up sleeping.
But as I lay in bed waiting for sleep, I find myself composing sentences and paragraphs, openings and conclusions, arguments, sometimes even layout ideas! How I wish there is a device that can translate all my thoughts into entries here. I feel inspired. Then I realize and remind myself that this blog is really just for me--an outlet for my ideas, and a repository for my thoughts and memories.
Well... I guess tonight is a little bit different. I actually took the time to sit, write and click 'publish'. Can I keep it up this time? Let's see.
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